|This was the first photo of me ever posted to Facebook. I am as graceful and co-ordinated as ever. Like an elegant snow deer.|
- To redirect my energy into the friendships and relationships that mean the most to me, instead of fielding notifications from twice-met acquaintances inviting me to play games fifty times a day and making me feel fed up with other people in general. I am an introvert, and although I love people (some of them anyway), I don't have enough energy to go around everyone and still feel happy and relaxed at the end of the day. I'd like to be able to focus more on specific people and, frankly, let the rest go. (I was planning to do some cord cutting at this last new moon but instead I had a lovely migraine, so that will have to wait until I shake off the post-migraine collywobbles.)
- To avoid self-consciousness and comparing myself to others. It's easy to fall into the trap of worrying too much about what everyone else is doing and forgetting to focus on my own life. I'm currently going through a sort of refining process, tweaking my existence into something that feels good... it doesn't have to look good from the outside and it won't necessarily look good on Instagram (although I like Instagram - I try to not take it too seriously. Mostly I post photos of books, new T-shirts or me doing daft things in public rather than trying to take the prettiest selfie or whatever. I went through that trying-to-be-Instacool phase earlier this year and it was fail).
- Similarly, because I hate feeling like an image or a brand more than a person. I don't want to plaster only the best bits of my day all over the internet in the hopes of impressing somebody. Even in people's holiday photos now, you can see that a lot of us have worried more about our hair, make-up or outfit than the beautiful scenery behind us. Facebook has turned us into witnesses of our own experience - we frame things and edit them rather than throwing ourselves into them. I want to see more photos of scruffy bastards enjoying themselves. I want to BE that messy-haired scruff in the nerdy jumper grinning madly because, wow, there's a mountain behind me, not worrying about my eyebrows or the fact that my smile is too gummy and this amazing experience I'm having might not look as good to other people if I am not perfect enough (the horror).
- Because it intrudes into the actual, real life that I'm living. Even if I don't delete Facefail, I will remove the app from my phone because I'm tired of having interesting one-on-one conversations interrupted by the aggressive buzzzzzz of an FB notification. Perhaps it's because I'm a bit of an old lady, but I find it inherently rude that we seem to be intended to drop whatever we're actually doing (and turn away from the person we're actually talking to) because somebody we went to school with back in the mists of time has sent us a poke.
- I realise this might be a bit on the passive-aggressive side, but I for one slipped easily into the habit of inviting people to an event with just a couple of clicks (a problem in itself for me, because I end up inviting all and sundry so as not to offend anyone and then having a larger group than I know how to cope with), and I kind of miss the days when, if someone genuinely wanted to see me at a gathering of any kind, they'd text or call me and speak to me about it. I want to know that if I'm invited to something it's because somewhere along the line someone has thought 'Oh it'd be nice to see such-and-such at our party', and not 'Oh but if she sees the photos and knows we all got together without her she'll be upset,' or, even worse, 'Well, the more randomers we invite the more popular we'll look.' Spoiler alert: I do not mind if I am not invited to every single thing. I have books and Tumblr and box sets of Thrones. I'm sure I'll be fine if you'd rather hang out with your other friends this time.
- On the flip side, feeling like crap if I can't make it to a specific event. I love you, friend, and I will try to come to your important thing, but I don't drive and I work in retail which is not a good combo for getting to things/having weekends. I don't need a case of the guilts for six weeks afterwards.
- Also, sometimes I'd like to be able to say no to things that I just don't feel like doing without it being a huge deal. I know this sounds anti-social but the trouble with Facebook is that one's calendar can get a bit overcrowded, and I really need a lot of recharge time. I am the epitome of Netflix and chill, and sometimes I just need my space.
- Because I miss when I used to get together with buddies after somebody had been away somewhere and look through their holiday photos. That was a whole social convention that has just vanished into the ether and I know it's sad but I stubbornly miss that.
- To keep my private life private. Maybe it's ironic for a blogger but I don't want to fall into the oversharing trap. Some moments of my life are just for me. Or just for me and the people I'm sharing them with. I don't want the temptation to splurge these bright, shining, life-changing instants for the delectation - or amusement - of others, I want to hoard them and treasure them all to myself.
- I have better uses for my time. More and more often I find myself looking to my phone for entertainment when I'm waiting, travelling or on my lunch break. Uh, hello, but I have books for that. When did I get so interested in what everyone else is doing? If X friend did an awesome thing, I'm sure she'll tell me about it when next we talk. I don't have to hang my eyeballs out on FB all the time for fear of missing something.
So what do you guys think? I know I'm a cranky old lady in a twenty-four-year-old body, but how do you feel about Facebook? Would you quit? Are you addicted? Let me know. ^^